Divorced Women – Stop Holding a Grudge!

Hi everybody! I hope you had a fabulous 4th of July, and that you all survived the festivities.

This week I want to remind you of the importance of releasing the past and the power it can have over you.

Click play for a quick reminder of how to recognize if you are still hanging on, and how to stop it.


Here is the transcript for those who like to read:

Hi! It Christia Sale, the Selfish Woman!

Ok – you are finally free from the ugly marriage you were in.

You have released yourself from the physical obligation… from the legal obligations.

But have you released yourself from the emotional obligations?

Forgiven yourself for your part in it and released it to the Universe?

Good question. And it deserves an honest answer – from YOU.

Can you honestly say that you have let go of your resentment for the way you were treated in this whole thing?

Do you really feel like you have made peace with the past and your part in it?

It’s time to Stop Holding A Grudge!

It’s time to release the past and the power it has over you.

As long as you breathe life into that old story by retelling it and talking about it, the longer it will have power over you. And the only one that suffers is you.

And when I say power, I mean the effect it has on your emotions. How talking about that time in your life can bring back those painful feelings that you so desperately want to escape from.

But how can you escape from them if you continue to bring them back into your existence. And you are doing this voluntarily!

Voluntarily… as in self-imposed!  Stop that!

“You don’t drown by falling in water. You drown by staying there.”

Yes, you have to mourn the loss of the “dream” of a happy marriage. It is part of the healing process and it is healthy. But continuing to use that story as an excuse why you are not happy now is a cop-out.

You are basically wallowing in the past and letting it define you.

Your divorce does not define you – YOU define you!

How you choose to respond to your divorce dictates how this is going to turn out for you.

As long as you continue to give your old story a lifeline, you will never get past the pain and you will forever be held back from reaching your full potential. Pull that plug now, before it turns back into a monster!

Nothing good comes from retelling that old story. But limitless possibilities can come from where you choose to go from here. It is your choice!

You have a new chance at writing your own ending, exactly how you want it to be!

Don’t waste it!

So, If this video was beneficial, hopeful, or inspiring, or if you just want to contribute to the conversation, leave me a comment below, make sure you subscribe, and share it with your friends. If you want access to more info plus extras that I can’t put on videos, go to themostselfishwomaninamerica.com & sign up for the updates.

This is Christia Sale, the Selfish Woman, saying You Deserve to be Happy and I’m here to help!

So until next time,

Happy Living!

Now it’s your turn. I want to hear from you.

Do you catch yourself talking about your old story and getting worked up all over again? Do you want to be able to stop that cycle?

Leave me a comment on your situation. We can work on it together. I’m here to help!



  1. monica says:

    suppose you were married to a narcissist and he wants to hold on and won’t let you go?
    He wants to continue the old story?

  2. Christia says:

    The answers are “NO” and “I am not participating.” You will be amazed at how powerful those two statements are.
    Also consistency is the key. Keep saying the same responses and he will get tired of trying. You don’t have to be mean or ugly. In fact, the more objective you are, the easier it is on everyone. Remember, we don’t take things personally anymore. Be calm, stay in control, and be consistent with your responses.
    You can do it!

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