Ok – you are finally free from the ugly marriage you were in. You have released yourself from the physical obligation of that marriage. You have released yourself from the legal obligation of that marriage.
But have you released yourself from the emotional obligation? Have you forgiven yourself for your part in it and released it to the Universe?
Good question. And a question that deserves an honest answer – from YOU.
You can say that you are over it all day long, but are you really?
Can you tell that old story without getting all worked up again? Can you honestly say that you have let go of your resentment for the way you were treated in this whole thing? Do you really feel like you have made peace with the past and your part in it?
It’s time to Stop Holding A Grudge!
It’s time to release the past and the power it has over you.
As long as you breathe life into that old story by retelling it and talking about it, the longer it will have power over you. Because the only one that suffers is you! (And your kids if you have any.)
When I say “power” I mean the effect it has on your emotions; the effect it has on your decision making. And how talking about that time in your life can bring back those painful feelings that you so desperately want to escape from.
But how can you escape from those feelings if you continue to bring them back into your existence? And you are doing it to yourself! Stop it!
“You don’t drown by falling in water. You drown by staying there.” ~ Unknown.
Yes, you have to mourn the loss of the “dream” of a happy marriage. It is part of the healing process and it is healthy. But continuing to use that story as an excuse for why you are not happy now is a cop-out.
You are essentially floundering in the past and letting it define you.
Your divorce does not define you – YOU define you!
If you’ve read my book , you know that how you choose to respond to your divorce dictates how this is going to turn out. You can wallow in self-pity, not changing the circumstances and prolonging your misery, or you can choose to make the most of this new chance at happiness.
“Let go. Why do you cling to pain? There is nothing you can do
about the wrongs of yesterday. It is not yours to judge. Why
hold on to the very thing which keeps you from hope and love?”
You should be thanking your lucky stars that you have another chance at happiness! Because the first time didn’t work out so well!
As long as you continue to give your old story a lifeline, you will never get past the pain. You will forever be held back from reaching your full potential. Pull that plug sister now, before that monster comes back to life!
Remember, with life comes phases. And with each phase comes change. Consider this your next phase. You can make this next phase the best phase yet depending on how you choose to respond to your divorce.
Nothing good can come from retelling that old story. But limitless possibilities can come from releasing that past. Because it is your choice!
Stop Holding a Grudge!
You have a new chance at writing your own ending!
Don’t Waste It!
Until next time,
P.S. Are you still holding a grudge or are you letting go? Let me know how you are releasing your old story to make room for your new one by leaving a comment below. It may help others.